GERT MANSION

[Dan-O From Five-O]

Alright guys, the last post in "New" Gert material is almost a year old. My birthday is coming up in early November and I want a new song. You have about 2 weeks or so to get it done by my birthday. So here's the deal.

I want a completely rocking song done in my honor by November 2nd (my birthday) and it should include lyrics about what a complete tool I am. And I want contributions by every member of Gert. Because I love you guys in a completely non-homosexual way. If you need help with the topic, here goes.

My youngest daughter had a recent annual girl scout outing to a relatively near State Park. This was my first attendance to such an outing, but descriptions from my wife made it sound like loads of fun and that drinking after dark would be completely acceptable. However upon arrival at the camp, I quickly found out that open drinking of alcoholic beverages at any point would be a serious breach of etiquette. Apparently one of the dad's in the camp the year before had gotten more intoxicated than the mom's were comfortable with, and fucked things up for this years trip.

Unfortunate me.

Of course I did what any of you would do, I waited until the party poopers went to bed, and drank anyway. We were cool for the first night, Saturday night....not so much. In my and a buddy's attempts to be discrete on the next night (Saturday) we were doing shots and drinking beers in my wife's car when someone (we still haven't figured out who) decided to do a parking lot check of some sort. The point is we got busted sitting out in the car drinking like a couple of fucking teenagers. It was all cool until we all went back to the camp site and someone made a "Broke Back Mountain" reference and my overly homophobic friend went off and read the other dad's the riot act about not standing up for their rights because the mom's had forced us to drink in hiding because of the previously undisclosed "no drinking rule" and the other idiot dad's behavior the year before. Anyway, maybe that's the title, maybe it's just a funny story, maybe it's not inspirational enough to get another song out of you guys....... but I sure do hope maybe this post is.

Let's have it Gert. By November 2nd would be great, but I can wait until Christmas. New music Gert, the world needs it.
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Three fatties and a Keg of FourTwenty sounds like the same thing to me.

[tonetripper]

I laughed very hard at the story Dan, thanks!!!! You are right, I would have totally done what you did. I'm in.
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.... and there he was accepting of the nice warm chocolate milk.... mouth open..... cracks in his lips..... it was like heaven

[thehipcola]

haha!


I'm in too.
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thehipcola.com

[Boltoph]

Alright Dan-O. It's been done. Here it is:

http://www.highschool.org/songpage.php?key=everybody_calm_down

It's a song about how they should all calm down, get off of the brokeback mountain and just get grunk, openly. It's a song about repressed desires to drink alcohol, really. 'Cause they like when you're uptight, they like when you're frightened...

And the best part of it all is, well, we did it for you, for your birthday; and s.f., too.

I remember about two years ago I was Skyping Dan-O on vidcam on a Polish lady's PC, in a tiny Polish apartment where I was living at the time before i bought the house. Ah, the times have moved along, haven't they?
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Axe Grinder

[Des]

God, I just ate so much chicken wings.

[Smalltown Mike]

Well, as a college journalism professor who teaches an editing class, I need to point out that "much" refers to that which can be measured, while "many" refers to that which can be counted. So technically, you ate so "many" chicken wings.

While I'm at it, I should also point out that I'm grunk. Uh, fucker.
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Punk rök is for children.

[Des]

"pounds and pounds of chicken wings" sounds like a measurement to me. I ate so much pounds of wings.

You pedantic lush.

[Smalltown Mike]

Pounds can be counted. At least, by sober people.

So you ate so many pounds of chicken wings. Or, if you insist on much, you ate so much chicken. But you ate so many chickens.

Get it?
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Punk rök is for children.

[Des]

Are you implying it'd make more sense if I hadn't drank so many bëer?

[thehipcola]

ummm..... beers.

You meant to say, "...so much beers."
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thehipcola.com

[Smalltown Mike]

Sigh. Technically, so many beers, so much soss.

Starting to get it?

And yes, that's what I'm implying.
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Punk rök is for children.

[Leaf]

I got grunk at noon yesterday. It was glorious. Until around 7 pm. Then I ran out of wine, and I was reluctant to tear into what is now today's soss.

I drank lots of water too. LOTS. Well, I drank much water.


Although I had many glasses of water, I drank much water.

Sometimes I like to look at photos of The Wave Whisperer and wonder... what happened? He used to have many bulges but now it's not much.



Hmmm... I seem to have found a problem Mr. Teacher. Isn't the preceding sentence correct? It refers to the same quantity of bulges, yet if I say "many" at the end it's just not right. Prof. HELLO. Wake the fuck up and help.
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I haven't forgotten. I wait... like Gordie Howe.

[thehipcola]

Mind your bulges.


AND your dangling participals.
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thehipcola.com

[Dan-O From Five-O]

[Smalltown Mike]

Uh ... isn't this the "Kick Ass got grunk at noon" thread?
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Punk rök is for children.